Battle of the sexes

Battle+of+the+sexes

Serena Paulson and Aaron Marner

Later on in this article, Aaron Michael Marner is going to argue how being a boy is so incredibly difficult. Understanding that I am biased, I still feel that girls deal with all the struggles that boys do and more. Getting up in the morning, the pounding desire for caffeine, the continual lack of sleep, affect all of us. But after girls get up, there is the expectation for hair to be done and makeup to apply. One is obligated to coordinate their outfit. COORDINATE THEIR OUTFIT. Girls can’t just wear red basketball shorts with a blue t-shirt and be have it be okay, they must follow the norms of society and dress accordingly.

For example, getting ready for a dance or any other formal occasion is significantly harder as a girl, compared to boys just have to shower. Short hair takes probably less than 10 minutes to air dry. If I, a girl with long hair, even bother to try and blow dry my hair to speed up the usual 2 hour process, it takes a solid 20 minutes. Then it is expected that I have to curl or straighten it. Then I get to do even fancier makeup in order to outdo what I do on any other normal day.

Another pain of being female is the heels. These sickly contraptions are made by Satan himself, who is a very prominent he-man woman-hater. High heels above 3 inches are especially desired, despite the fact that they’re a death trap. Say goodbye to walking without pain, because these little demons suck. Whats worse is it’s what’s normal, and you can’t even walk properly. How are you supposed to run away from that creepy guy that keeps telling you how nice you smell when you are incapable of making a dash because of your heels? The only point I can see in wearing the torture devices is that you can take them off and use them as a weapon against ones attacker.

Girls have even more stress as boobs are a lot of work. For any girl with a C cup or bigger, kiss those little strapless dresses goodbye, unless you are into the nip slip. Strapless bras are the biggest joke I’ve ever heard of. They are a struggle to keep in place so you are constantly doing the whole lowkey pull-up move every two minutes. There are stick-on bras, or you can use little pieces of duct tape to keep them from moving. Either way, there is a lot of labor involved to keep breasts in place.

#YesAllMen

My fellow Nigerians, today is a sad day. Serena Paulson tried to tell me it is harder to be a girl than it is to be a guy. What? Obviously life is far, far harder for men than for women. The fact that I even have to argue such with such a peasant shows the pain and torture all men must endure.

Let’s start with the basic stereotypes that come with being a man. Men are supposed to be tough. Men aren’t allowed to cry unless they are watching a dramatic sports movie, but it’s every man’s dream to curl up on the couch on a rainy day and have a Nicholas Sparks movie marathon. The Notebook? The Last Song? Dear John? Sign me up!

Then there are the expectations that are placed on men when it comes to dates. Everyone knows men are supposed to pay for meals, drive their dates home, hold open doors, and all that fun stuff. The worst part, however, is the ludicrous idea that men are supposed to wear pants. Women can wear dresses or skirts on dates, but men must wear pants, and PANTS SUCK. Why can’t a guy just wear a dress once in a while? I’m not saying we as guys would exercise that option, but just having that door open is what it’s all about.

Why should guys pay for every date? Women have it easy.

Either way, girls and boys both have it rough. How difficult their lives are depends on what they are dealing with, and we all have to deal with different struggles. The continual societal pressures of what we are supposed to do will always affect us, as much as we don’t want it too. Girls and boys alike are going to both have it hard, so might as well not bicker about it.