Halloween movie spooktacular

Around Halloween every year almost everything around us is looking to give us a scare. Whether it’s trick or treaters in ghoulish costumes, haunted houses and even blockbuster films. This year I went for the unconventional scare. I set out to watch some of the worst Halloween and horror movies ever to grace the silver screen. Not looking to get scared or unsettled by gore, blood murderers or monsters, I was looking for the few movies that would send a real chill down my spine. I wanted to find the unbelievably bad movies, I wanted to be shocked, not by the story line, but by poor production values, writing and acting. Here are some of the worst. Spaced Invaders: Five wacky Martians come to earth looking to conquer mankind, but there’s a twist. These “spaced” invaders come on Halloween and no one will take them seriously! Mistaken as trick or treaters, the Martians’ plans are just about foiled. Full of wacky misunderstandings, this movie will bring the laughs! In reality, this is possibly one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. The acting and bad humor alone will send you screaming from your seat. Santa’s Slay: When Santa’s two thousand year old contract of goodness with an angel expires, he’s ready to bring a little hell for Christmas this year. Maybe a professional wrestler isn’t the best person to cast in a lead role, aside from Hulk Hogan in 3 Ninjas: High Noon at Ninja Mountain, but Goldberg’s acting was one of the leading contributors to this movie being horrible. Although Santa’s Slay is supposed to be a horror/comedy, there’s nothing funny about the bad acting and poor (if any) character development. Filled with profanity, plenty of nudity, and lots of horrific murders, the writers obviously took a mental vacation in the process of writing this movie. House Of The Dead: Tomb Raider, Resident Evil, Mortal Kombat, and Street Fighter. All are movies based on video games, but all are leagues above House Of The Dead. Based on the SEGA zombie shoot ‘em up game, this movie does no justice to the zombie movie genre. I won’t even bother mentioning the actors in this movie, as you’ll never see them in any movies again. I’d be surprised if the actors weren’t reading their lines off of que cards when they were filming. Almost more outrageous than the acting is the number of bullets fired; the amount of ammunition used in this movie rivals that of Rambo. But don’t be fooled, this movie lacks any intensity that any good horror or action movie should have. The scariest part of this movie is that someone was willing to shell out nine million dollars for production, and not to mention the made-for-T.V sequel. Ernest Scared Stupid: Compared to the rest of these movies, Ernest Scared Stupid might as well have won the Sundance film festival. Jim Varney’s acting stands out in the cast of assorted nine year- olds, and holds the movie together. Although this movie is far from scary, it might bring a few smiles to your face with Varney’s off the wall acting style. Maybe on a different level than all these movies entirely, Ernest Scared Stupid is something terrible everyone has to watch at least once-kind of like a live birth. All these movies might be highly disregarded by film critics around the world, and just about everyone else. But just thinking that somebody out there in Hollywood thought these movies would succeed is just plain spooky.