Kendall vs The Burrito

In was a brisk and windy Thursday morning. The web staff was tired from a day of advocating free speech and protesting government censorship. The day was winding down and turning back into a regular and boring school day, yet through the darkness rose a champion. One Kendall Stow, who claimed greatness in the field of competitive eating. Fueled by three hamburgers, several bags of chips and a dozen cookies, Kendall was ready to take on the Mr Burrito challenge. The challenge consists of eating a massive Mr Burrito burrito in less than 10 minutes. Consisting of two tortillas, six scoops of rice, layering of lettuce and tomatoes, several scoops of beans and dozens of shredded chickens, the burrito was roughly the size of a small baby. It was also too large to fully close, with its contents spilling over the tortilla edge. Although Kendall proclaimed his ability to consume the massive culinary creation, within several bites it became apparent that the Web champion was struggling. Perhaps he had eaten too much earlier, or perhaps the burrito merely bested him, but once the 10 minutes passed about half the burrito still remained. It was a dark day for the Web as the other journalists were forced to descend upon the burrito like jackals and finish the work that Kendall had strived to do. Our champion had been vanquished by the mighty burrito, but the Web would live to fight another day. Kendall will once more take up the burrito challenge and has spent the past few weeks preparing for his future mighty feast.