Single’s Awareness Day

Every year, February 14th is comes around and the world divides itself into two distinct categories of people. One group of people refer to the 14th as Valentine’s Day, named after an early Christian martyr who supposedly administered marriages to soldiers as well as kept the faith when the ancient Catholic Church suffered persecution at the hands of various groups. Birds of love (doves in paticular) are assoceated with his name. This same group of people observe this secular holiday as a means to express romantic affection for another individual, according to most estimates, to the tune of a billion Valentines Day cards and nearly a billion dollars in consumer spending. A second group, however, takes a more pessimistic approach. (CUT). Using the term “Single’s Awareness Day” to denote both their relationship status and outlook on life, they spend their time doing various nonromantic tasks. The noted scholar and academic Charles Ripley said that he will spend his Singles Awareness Day cooking for friends. This reporter will be watching Star Trek and prepping debate. When questioned, many sources reported that they would spend the 14th eating ice cream and crying themselves to sleep